A brief history of me.
I was one of those sensitive kids.
Empathic and intuitive as a child, I had a difficult time dealing with the abundance of discordant energy in my environment. I had an awareness, a knowing, that what I was witnessing in familial relations, the school system, and the world around me was not "right".
I became depressed at an early age. Anxiety paralyzed me. I hid within my self, fearful of the world and it's inhabitants. I saw through the lies and false beliefs of those around me. I learned to be a victim and to give away my power. I felt helpless, useless and unwanted.
I identified with my story of being a victim: it was my identity. I knew there was great strength in me but I blamed everyone and everything outside of my self for my unhappiness. It was like I couldn't help myself.
Around the age of 16 I was introduced to psychology and philosophy. I immersed myself in books, looking for answers and cures for the state of my being. I had a few peak experiences as a teenager, but quickly fell back into the comfortable agony of depression and anxiety.
In my mid twenties I hit a new low and became so riddled with anxiety attacks that I only left my house when absolutely necessary. The heavy blackness overwhelmed me. I just wanted to die. Knowing that I could not help my self, I turned to psychiatry and soon started taking anti depressants. The drugs saved my life and the doctor convinced me that, given my history, I would be on them for the rest of my life. I didn't like taking medication, but it enabled me to function as a semi "normal" person... for a while. Seven years later, in my early thirties, I started to slip into depression and anxiety once again. I weened myself off the drugs... just in time to discover I was pregnant, one of my biggest fears, and my biggest catalyst for change.
Throughout my episodes of depression, I knew that I had been denying my intuition and I knew that this denial had something to do with my unhappiness. I started to pay attention. There was something in me that I was denying, it was a voice, a knowing. It was always there.
The birth of my son brought up great insecurities but also a reemergence of the voice within me. There was something I had to do, something to explore. I knew it had to do with spirituality and my psychic abilities- of which I was terrified.
I made a vow to my self to listen to that voice because I knew it held the answers and would guide me out of my own personal hell... and it did.
I took responsibility for my life. I allowed myself to be led down a path of true self discovery.
Through the process of listening to that voice, I was lead to energy work. I didn't know what it was but I heard a whisper to explore it. I was led to take an IET class. That first day of class, I was nervous and uncomfortable... until I started channeling the energy. It was so familiar to me, like I had done it hundreds of times before.
I continued to take classes and started going to energy healers for help. I could feel the layers of darkness peeling away. It was a miracle- the answer! It was hard and frightening work at times, but so, so worth it. I started to feel lighter and happier and alive. My mind was quieting down, the depression lifted. Life was different.
It became my goal to clear as much of myself as possible so that I could be a clear channel for the energy that flows through me and for the guidance that I receive.
I haven't stopped.
Self growth and self exploration are priorities in my life, as is the passion to assist others in their own healing.
I continue to expand and discover. I'm looking at my shadows and discovering my light.
Empathic and intuitive as a child, I had a difficult time dealing with the abundance of discordant energy in my environment. I had an awareness, a knowing, that what I was witnessing in familial relations, the school system, and the world around me was not "right".
I became depressed at an early age. Anxiety paralyzed me. I hid within my self, fearful of the world and it's inhabitants. I saw through the lies and false beliefs of those around me. I learned to be a victim and to give away my power. I felt helpless, useless and unwanted.
I identified with my story of being a victim: it was my identity. I knew there was great strength in me but I blamed everyone and everything outside of my self for my unhappiness. It was like I couldn't help myself.
Around the age of 16 I was introduced to psychology and philosophy. I immersed myself in books, looking for answers and cures for the state of my being. I had a few peak experiences as a teenager, but quickly fell back into the comfortable agony of depression and anxiety.
In my mid twenties I hit a new low and became so riddled with anxiety attacks that I only left my house when absolutely necessary. The heavy blackness overwhelmed me. I just wanted to die. Knowing that I could not help my self, I turned to psychiatry and soon started taking anti depressants. The drugs saved my life and the doctor convinced me that, given my history, I would be on them for the rest of my life. I didn't like taking medication, but it enabled me to function as a semi "normal" person... for a while. Seven years later, in my early thirties, I started to slip into depression and anxiety once again. I weened myself off the drugs... just in time to discover I was pregnant, one of my biggest fears, and my biggest catalyst for change.
Throughout my episodes of depression, I knew that I had been denying my intuition and I knew that this denial had something to do with my unhappiness. I started to pay attention. There was something in me that I was denying, it was a voice, a knowing. It was always there.
The birth of my son brought up great insecurities but also a reemergence of the voice within me. There was something I had to do, something to explore. I knew it had to do with spirituality and my psychic abilities- of which I was terrified.
I made a vow to my self to listen to that voice because I knew it held the answers and would guide me out of my own personal hell... and it did.
I took responsibility for my life. I allowed myself to be led down a path of true self discovery.
Through the process of listening to that voice, I was lead to energy work. I didn't know what it was but I heard a whisper to explore it. I was led to take an IET class. That first day of class, I was nervous and uncomfortable... until I started channeling the energy. It was so familiar to me, like I had done it hundreds of times before.
I continued to take classes and started going to energy healers for help. I could feel the layers of darkness peeling away. It was a miracle- the answer! It was hard and frightening work at times, but so, so worth it. I started to feel lighter and happier and alive. My mind was quieting down, the depression lifted. Life was different.
It became my goal to clear as much of myself as possible so that I could be a clear channel for the energy that flows through me and for the guidance that I receive.
I haven't stopped.
Self growth and self exploration are priorities in my life, as is the passion to assist others in their own healing.
I continue to expand and discover. I'm looking at my shadows and discovering my light.
